I am tired and stressed. Yet there are greater sufferers than I. If I will achieve anything, let it spurn a yarn of love, gathering more followers of the One whose love is most craved.

Just don't reveal to me at how any of these labours are:
in vain
won't eventuate into anything praisable.

I will surely [die].

Lonesomeness

Called you tonight.
No remnant of the past.
No incling for the future
but a convenience of the present.

And I don't know why

exactly.

I just felt so silly.

A grape in my throat
squeezed water from the lids

and my voice went on
to cry
its own
tears.

Suddenly,
like plastic

I was malleable to you.

Clear and cryptic
as the wrap
you half-helped

me escape.

Palette

So our crime was closeness
at record speed
and time.
Too porous for the gloves we gave it.

The seams, wide open
allowed for even
gentlest attacks
to massacre.

While Wisdom calls for distance
at length,

One cannot simply sever, for,
the human heart
does not work that way.

Permit this seed to blossom
slowly as it must.

Keeping in mind
it will not bloom
had the soil
been unwatered

INT. TRAIN CARRIAGE - DAY

A packed train. Every seat is filled while a GIRL, 20, struggles to find one. Around her neck - her state of the art camera, the kind that is used amongst hardcore photographic elitists. She soon finds a seat next to a BUSINESSMAN and plonks herself down, only for it to resound in a loud "crack" sound.

Upon reflex, she mouths a "sorry" to him and lifts up her bottom.

SHOT - A newly quashed sushi box.

He glares at her. She then takes a photo of him, with her bright white flash and everything. After that second he drops the glare and smiles.

BUSINESSMAN
Just my lunch.

He picks it up from under her. She takes another shot of him, now smiling.

BUSINESSMAN (cont.)
Should still be good.

After a second--

BUSINESSMAN
Can I ask, why the photos?

GIRL
(pointing to his open window)
I liked your expressions. I wanted to show you your selection of faces, you know, like before the wind changes.

When your life is God-centred, the aim is to glorify Him.

A few things here:

- God gives all your dilemma-ble situation-al circumstances a context.
- So in each grating happenstance, you must ask yourself: What would Jesus do? Does this glorify the Father? In carrying out this thought/word/deed will I further His kingdom?

THE SITUATION

As I have taken a pledge of singleness (also known as the "Boy Fast") I will dodge any prospect of a relationship for the next year or so. I do not care who the boy is, or how godly or compatible he could possibly be for me, if it is my Heavenly Father's will, it will kick off eventually. Moving right along -

So last night I bumped into a boy whom I had met earlier this year. In that time, I considered him for a fleeting second, then I massacred the consideration. He spoke to me about relatively beyond-surface-level issues for a good twenty minutes, and then I stopped listening to what he was saying and thought to myself:

If you are not interested in me, please end this conversation now, as this is rather unhelpful.

God was inside my head. He sent over a friend to disrupt our conversation and so I got away.

THE LESSON

While I enjoy this particular boy's conversation, and would probably very much take pleasure in the things we share in common, it wasn't beneficial for my situation. While God is molding, shaping, and refining my broken heart, it is better that I avoid fleeting pleasures and trust that He witholds no good thing from those who walk uprightly. I shall delight in my Lord, and He will, in His perfect timing, give me what my heart desires.

Jesus has come to rescue, redeem.
He is the only answer for the world today.
I know you crave, you salivate {}

You are enslaved to the bondage of your feeble excuses.

The mantle will crack
will crackle
will finally cave in
and
nothing will be left.

You will realise He was Truth
Way
Life all along.

All along.

cloud

When you f l
o a
t

on clouds
of white

you must be weightless.

What I would give
To return to ground.

Beloved reality smacks,
then tumble into tallest trees.

Perhaps it is the fire that rises,
which looms

n c i r
e c
l i n g

rudimentary anguish.

Maybe,
the simplest

WAY OUT

is to jump on a cloud

to lift
to escape.

I once
fell intoo deep
infatuation with a boy.

I was so entranced
by the meaning of his many silences

the nod of his head
at each glimpse of my weaknesses

that while we barely touched
in greeting
or parting

our emotion-hill
arose every level.

His melancholy became
my melancholy.

My decadence became
his decadence.

I embraced
wholly.

Left hand, right hand
right foot, left foot

until my entirety was his.

And

no--

I don't dote on
terrified tear-drops
created
in spite of you

boy.