1. being friends with a man is different to being friends with a woman. you need to make things clear about where you stand.
2. it is dangerous to spend time with a man alone unless you define what your relationship is with him. (so, if he's married, respect that. if he's single, tell him you want to honour him as a brother and that you respect him, and want to enjoy the relationship that way).
3. if you develop feelings for a man during boyfast, tell him if appropriate. talk it through and ask him to help guard your heart in this time. if you allow them to fester they may grow, therefore hindering your heart's focus on God.
4. i am never lonely. the Holy Spirit is always with me !
5. it is normal to want to be wanted. it is normal to want affection. (one of my best girls is being pursued at the moment, and she is beaming--)
6. every woman wants to be pursued.
7. every woman is being pursued, whether she realises this or not.
8. i absolutely, ardently, and completely adore singleness. it is one of the most underestimated human states.
9. God loves me.
10. i may not be the most beautiful girl in the country, nor the state, but to Him i mean the world. and He is beauty in its very essence . He created it. and He created me !
11. getting married and having babies one day shouldn't be idolised.
12. God . deserves. all . the . gloryfullstop.
7 comments:
Some interesting thoughts, and valid observations (esp the need to clarify the difference between being friendly with and being interested in a guy)
I wonder how many poor boys' hearts you have crushed with your steadfast determination to your "BoyFast". :-)
Not to cause you to waver, but have you ever worried that maybe your determination to stay boy-free means you may ruin a partner with whom you would have delighted in each day for the rest of your life? What makes you so sure that the perfect guy for Jessi Tosa isn't going to come along during your partner-free period?
To me, and this is just my opinion of course, but both extremes seem kind of silly and illogical - to seek constantly and earnestly with every person of the desired gender for them to be your romantic partner, and to ignore anybody no matter what happens.
Your response, ma'am?
haa...
first of all, I didn't know anyone was reading my blogs..
second, I have just turned twenty. I am so young. A brother in Christ whom I have enormous respect for has convinced me that one should not pursue a relationship or allow to be pursued unless they are ready for marriage. Now, I know there are plenty of people who marry at very young, I'm not saying I disagree, but for someone like me God is just saying No.
I have been through too much and don't even feel right in my heart this moment in time. If I said yes to a man's pursuit of me I would immediately know I was making a huge mistake.
In short, this is the season of Jesus and I. He, is my heart's desire, my soul's Deliverer... that is my purpose in life, to fall more in love with Him and to share His gospel with others. Marriage is secondary. And if He has marriage somewhere down the track for me, it will be to further my love for Him and not my husband.
Hey Jess,
I have to agree 100% with you here. I think defining relationships with single guys when you're single is a really wise move. And I have noticed I've really underappreciated my singleness, but it's in my singleness that my whole heart is God's and that is what makes me happiest and most fulfilled.
Having boy attention and being 'pursued' is totally nice but it's like eating lots of fairy floss.. it's bad in large quantities and makes me feel a little ill because it draws my focus away from God.
:)
Oh oops. Maybe "Kitty" isn't so obvious... this is Cathrine. :)
<3
Of course people read your blogs... I use the magic of RSS, which allows me to see updates and new articles posted to goodness-knows-how-many websites, including webcomics, blogs, news sites (metal music related news, not real news), and so on. Occasionally I flick through them. You are lucky in that your blog is the last one in one of my sections, so I tend to notice it slightly more often. Plus you write extremely well, and creatively. Your posts are often a joy to read. In fact, some of your posts are probably as 'arty' (in the 'abstract yet beautiful' sense of the word) as I go now I'm no longer at school, etc.
Regarding your response, I won't say I agree 100% with you, but I can see the value in what you are saying. I can also admire your steadfast refusal to bow to what is a very strong, innate, and human desire - to be loved and held by somebody of the preferred gender. Perhaps it is indeed possible to conquer such strong forces at work within us?
:-) I just counted, and I have approximately 78 websites' RSS feeds in Mozilla Thunderbird, the free email client, in the same software family as Firefox.
No wonder I rarely read them all.
I think singleness is a gift.
I think singleness is a gift I definitely don't have.
I reiterate what Cat said:
"it's in my singleness that my whole heart is God's and that is what makes me happiest and most fulfilled."
I was listening to a Piper sermon on my bike ride this morning: "It is when we are most satisfied in God that glory is given to Him."
However I don't limit God's power. He may decide to give me the gift of singleness later on in my life. Perhaps that is how we "conquer such strong forces within us" !
I have to say, at this moment in time, in the last few weeks of my BoyFast, I don't feel that God is the only one pursuing me....
Post a Comment